I haven't blogged in a really long time... I think it's about time I get to it! Ha! Well, May 2nd I had eleven months clean and sober. I have had so many experiences since I have blogged last... growing and learning experiences. I am truly blessed to have the people I have in my life. God put them there for a reason. I guess I will start about what's going on in my life....
I recently moved, well not so much recently, on March 5th to Carrollton to another Oxford House to help open it. The house actually burnt down last summer, and I was willing to help this house out and at first I thought it may of been a bad idea, but I can honestly say this has been an awesome experience! I love the people at my house, I have gotten close to the girls... I still love and miss the girls at my old house though too! I am glad God put the people in this house though.
Well, at the same time in moving I accepted at volunteer position in Oxford that has really opened up my eyes in helping others. Oxford has shown me a lot! I am so greatful to be apart of it! All in all, I am just truly blessed. I know I don't act like it a lot of the time, but I am truly greatful.
Well, in the mix of all this crazyness and change in my life I just got super stressed, of course. The main reason why... I wasn't relying on God. I was relying on self. I still do it. I had an experience with my sponsor today that has really shown me that God is there for me. All I have to do is rely on Him and do the next right thing. No matter if I want to or not. It's not about what I want anymore. It's about what He wants for me. I've got to trust God, clean house, and help others. Here lately, I am starting to realize it more and more. And yes, I know some are thinking why now? Why after 11 months? Well, I am stubborn! That's why. I am controlling, I want what I want and when I don't get what I want I mess things up! The whole thing is that God is in control. Not Erica. Nothing happens by mistake in God's world. People, places, and things are put in my life for my reason... and it's not for me to sit here and think why. It's the actions that I take upon those people, places, or things. If I just do what God tells me, then I am going to be okay. I am a work in progress. I have finally realized as wierd and strange as it may seems that I haven't done anything. I am not the one that has kept me sober. I am not the one that has done anything in my life. It's all God and for that... I am truly greatful for.
and p.s. my sponsor is AWESOME! and she's helped me greatly through this experience that has opened up my eyes. so if you are reading this (you know who you are) ... thanks! :)
